April Newsletter

April 9, 2016 1:49 pm

Happy Belated Easter Everyone

We are finalising the preparations for this year’s festival and have spent a lot of money making some substantial improvements including lots of boring things like parking teams, temporary roadway, water and in addition some less boring things such as the site art, the children’s area, improving the PA systems and toilets. It’s all very rock and roll.

We will say this again just in case you didn’t read it in our past newsletters; the parking is now very close to the campsite and you do not need to go down any steps. It is very trolley friendly, so let yourselves go and enjoy the walk in.

Convoy Cabaret Line Up Additions

The randomly lovely Convoy Cabaret have been hard at it planning this years new Bearded Theory attraction. They already have an amazing festival line up and in addition they have booked in some late night and early afternoon acoustic acts. Acoustic/daytime/late night acoustic acts. In a rather disorganized order they are CAPTAIN HOTKNIVES, ROB MILLER, CHRIS BUTLER, DOZER MC DOOZE, ANDY T, FFTP, EDDY ALLEN, SIDI MAN AND JACK OF HEARTS, CHASING WHISKEY, CAPTAIN GRIMACE, JOHNNY TURPENTINE, BECKY FURY, RICH NOT FAMOUS, CHRIS THE POET and BILLY THE SQUARE. The DJ offering is equally as decent and they include PAULY PIPER, OBERON, TRAV CHAV, MARK KELLY, CHRIS D’ BASE and STEVE RUDEBOY. Convoy sideshows include God Shave the Queen, Lucky Cat Musements, Twattoo Parlour, Freak Boutique photo booth, Spanglegrinders, Convoy Chorus line and Ariel/acro/hoop displays plus a load more we couldn’t write down.

Ticket Update

Tickets for this year’s festival start being distributed at the end of April by See Tickets. Disabled and carer passes start being distributed in early May. Do not panic if you see people getting tickets on social media and you haven’t had yours as we phase sending them out to avoid Mrs Goggins having a hissy fit. See Tickets also have a handy order tracker you can use which can be accessed by going here.

Tickets of all shapes and sizes are running very very low and we broke even in record time which is fantastic. We cannot thank you enough for your continued support.

Entry Times

Please make sure you read the entry and exit times on our general information page on our website but those of you who can’t be bothered here they are: – Gates open at 14:00 on Thursday 26th May and 09:00 Friday, Saturday & Sunday May for all weekend ticket holders. Gates close strictly at 20:00 on Thursday for entry/re-entry, 21:00 Friday & Saturday and 19:00 on Sunday. The general information page gives good information about ticket distribution, what you can bring, tent thefts and local hotels. Check it out

Bar Tariff

We love our bars and we have improved our offering once again. This year’s main ales are Bearded Theory Festival Ale – 3.8% Golden Bitter, Lord Marples – 4% Classic British Bitter, Galaxia – 4.4% Australian Hopped Pale Ale, I Love You, Will U Marry Me – 4.5% Strawberry Blonde, Jaipur – 5.9% IPA (voted Worlds Best Keg Beer), Parma Porter – 6% Parma Violet Porter, Cocoa Wonderland – 6.8% Chocolate Porter, St Petersburg – 7.4% Imperial Russian Stout. Prices start at £3.60 a pint and go up to around £4 for the stronger ales. The full bar list is here.


Don’t just worry about packing your beer and happy things, please do think about what clothes to bring also. It can get cold at night and with that bring your jumpers and also it can be hot like last year so bring your hot pants, mankinis and shorts as well.

We do our best to prevent tent thefts and have a very good track record catching them. However please do not stock up with cash and always keep your valuables on you at all times especially when sleeping in tents. Only bring what you can afford to lose but remember your safety is our main priority.


Directions to the festival are located here . Please read them and do not follow your SatNav, you will get stuck on a bridge if you do!